An Appeal for Election Eve

As we come to the end of a heated election season, there’s a strong impulse to impugn the character and motives of the other side. They’re “deplorable” or “criminal,” “racist” or “socialist,” or maybe in either case, simply “evil.” People are breaking from friends, family, and colleagues, because support for the opposition is tantamount to being in league with an enemy. How can you possibly associate with someone who believes in something so terrible?  This is a continuation of the well-documented Big Sort, in which people increasingly isolate themselves in a bubble of the like-minded.

I’m here to make an appeal to you: reject this impulse. It’s bad for you, and it’s bad for our country. Whichever side wins tomorrow will probably end up with around 60 million votes. Whichever side loses will have just a few million less. Don’t pretend that the half the country that doesn’t agree with you doesn’t exist, and don’t let yourself believe that they are somehow less American.

Instead, appreciate that people can come at the same issues from different sides honestly, and be humble enough to accept that no one — not even you, especially not me — has a monopoly on truth or morality. Keep talking to people of all stripes, even if you’re going to argue. Those relationships are important.

We can never assume that everyone thinks the way we do, nor that they should. This is a big, diverse country, and people come at situations from different perspectives. Understand that everyone has different values and life experiences and try to learn from what they tell you.

Listen to what people say, and more importantly, listen for what they’re trying to say. Do this even if what they’re saying offends you. Maybe do it especially if what they’re saying offends you.

Don’t believe that your party or your favorite candidate is always right. They aren’t. Don’t reject everything the other party says as being wrong. It isn’t.

Challenge what you hear and read, even if you often agree with the source. You’re plenty smart enough to make up your own mind and develop your own thoughts. Don’t take short cuts by becoming a parrot for somebody else’s talking points.

But also be less certain. Being smart doesn’t always mean you’re right. Accept that you might be wrong. You will be. Often.

Talk to people who challenge what you tell them. Consider their feedback, even if you don’t agree with it. At worst, you’ll learn what the opposition is so that you can better craft your argument. At best, you’ll gain valuable new perspective that will help you take a fresh look at the world.

Political opponents are not an enemy to be obliterated. They are your friends, neighbors, coworkers, and countrymen. It’s ok to disagree strongly.  It is good to fight passionately for what you believe in.

Don’t run from disagreement, and don’t disassociate from people with a different ideology than yours. Respect the honesty and dignity of other’s opinions. At the end of the day we’re in this together. There is no other choice. The best way we can move forward is by growing the number of voices we hear from, not shrinking it.